Transformation
by LostAndAwaiting
Summary: My first slash ever. One shot. RLSB. Marauder's Era. One of Remus' transformations is different than all the rest. How does Sirius calm the beast inside?


Transformation  
Rated: T  
Warnings: Slashy-goodness.  
Disclaimer: Don't own anything you recognize, sadly.  
A/N: First slash I've ever written. Please don't be be too hard. I know I should be updating my other stories, but I've had this nagging in the back of my head since I've read Il Cattivo's stories. So, she's sort of inspiration for this, but I had to write it. Please review.

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And suddenly, the beast subsided. Slowly, ever so slowly, the beast retracted. Soon after the cries of a scarred young man could be echoed throughout the building.

It had been one of the hardest transformations Remus had ever experienced. This was no ordinary transformation either, in both body and mind. The beast tore at every inch of the poor sixteen year old boy. He had barely climbed into manhood, and there he lay like a retched, injured pariah.

For he was.

Remus Lupin was used to being excluded. Most of the time it was he who was excluding himself, but it was compulsory. Remus was different from most his age and he had to make sure that no one could ever know the truth about him. It was a daunting, lonely path, but it was one that a dejected halfbreed had to make.

Of course he managed to make a few friends and they knew his secret. They took him in and he was one of them, but Remus was still wary. He trusted them like brothers and would do nearly anything for that friendship, but he was different than them. And sure they joked about it- even giving him such a playful nickname, "Moony", but it was all too surreal for him.

People were fickle; he was bound to loose it all. Remus just knew it. Everything was too perfect for it not to go wrong. James, Sirius, and even Peter had gotten so close to him that losing them would be too difficult. He had to detach himself or else he would get hurt.

That's how he found his solace between the pages of books. He was naturally smart, but he found that it was easier to slip into the mindset of studies than deal with people. Even if that meant not being around his friends as much as he should.

His bones ached. His head ached. His skin ached as the crimson color slid down his cheek and onto the cold, muggy floor of the Shrieking Shack. He was so tired of this. This incessant pain that shook the very being of his soul. He became this sickening, tainted beast that destroyed anything in its path.

And Remus felt that the creature was taking over his human form. This need to be a recluse was torturing him and creating a rather large gap with his friends. He knew they understood, but Remus had noticed the way that Sirius would turn his head whenever the boy would meet his eyes. Or how whenever Remus would talk, Sirius seemed like he was far off, probably dreaming about some girl.

Remus' affliction was causing harm to whatever he did and as he lay there, ever so still, letting his body try to recuperate from it being pillaged, yet again from the full moon, he suddenly felt calm.

He felt the warm of another's body lying next to him. This person stretched out his arm and tucked Remus closer to him. Lupin felt the other trying to calm him and suddenly, the boy had stopped screaming. It seemed that the soft embraces of this person had quenched his listless soul. The demons had stopped.

"Moony, Moony, it's all right. I'm here. You're fine. You're back. You're you!" The dark voice of such a hero cut the deafening silence that had built up.

Remus' mind was just starting to clear up, but was far too foggy to comprehend what was happening.

_Why was Padfoot there? How did he get in? Why am I calm?_

These were some of the questions that were swirling around the chaotic mind of a sixteen year old werewolf. Had he known that Sirius had waited all day for Remus or that with each scream or each horror emitted from the room that it tore into Sirius' own heart, perhaps it would have meant something to him. But all he knew was that he was safe in his arms and he was okay, because Sirius said so.

"Padfoot?" Moony whispered several minutes later.

"I'm here, Remus." The husky voice of his best mate cooed back.

"Why?"

The fog had lifted somewhat and Remus wanted to know why Sirius would brave so much just to comfort him.

"Because I'm your friend." He said, lying to himself and to Remus.

"Then why isn't Prongs or Wormtail here? Surely—" Remus was suddenly cut off by Sirius' touch.

The boy ran his hand lightly down Remus' side. Lupin questioned such a gesture by turning just the slightest and lifting his chin to gaze into the other's round, dark eyes.

There was no response. Sirius just gazed down longingly into Remus' hazel eyes. And though a few strands of light brown hair managed their way in front of his eyes, Sirius could see beyond them.

And it clicked.

Sirius was never avoiding Remus because of what he was, but rather because…

"Sirius…" Remus lost the words in his throat. He wasn't… He didn't see Sirius like…

"Please, Remus, don't." Sirius said as his hand wove its way around the slender torso of Remus.

He wanted to oppose him, but there was something keeping him from it. There was this nagging feeling in the back of his head that told him he wanted this all along. He had admired Sirius for a few years by this point and though he had made it with quite a few ladies, Remus always equated it with jealousy of having the opposite sex.

No, this was far different. This was something out of his wildest dreams. Something he would always blame on the wolf inside of him, but alas, it was his humanity reacting to Sirius now.

"Please, Sirius, hear me out…" He barely managed to get out as the soft touches and the nagging on his hemline at his hips stopped.

Though Sirius thought that he was going to be let down or rejected, he kept his charms up. With a smirk he looked down at the boy and nodded.

"I never thought this could happen. I never thought I could feel like this. Perhaps I'm just weak…"

"You are not weak, Remus." Sirius interjected, firmly.

"I don't know if I am feeling right. I don't know what I am feeling, but Sirius… Sirius, I—"

Again Sirius interjected, but this time it was a different use of his mouth. He brought his lips down on the other teen and felt him quiver. Sirius was not giving up without a fight. If he was to be rejected, he was going down with a fight.

However, it was the exact opposite emotion that Sirius thought Lupin was feeling. The fog had lifted and Lupin was beginning to understand what those years of repressed emotion meant. All the comments he kept to himself, all the anger due to Sirius that the wolf released, and all dreams Remus refused to acknowledge actually meant something. Those little glances at each other, the way they smiled, the proud pats on the back, the quick accidental touches, they had all meant something.

Remus turned over as Sirius kissed him. He felt his own hand glide against the other boy's arm and slide up to his face and then hair. Their kiss lengthened and Lupin let Sirius' tongue explore as his did the same. He let the other touch him. He let him initiate everything and he easily melted into his arms.

Soon the loss of oxygen to the both boys' lungs let them separate. Panting, Remus looked back into Sirius' eyes.

"I love you."

Three simple words that had sparked something heavy between both of their chests. Sirius drew Remus closer, captivating his lips once again. Remus wrapped his arms around the other and held him.

But the day's events had exhausted Remus and each muscle's movement was incredibly painful. He'd woven himself around Sirius and that was where he planned to stay. Remus' head lay on Sirius' chest. His eyes were closed, but he drew his breath to speak.

"Sirius…" He breathed out the other's name as he fell fast asleep, another transformation complete. And this one, surely, better than the rest.


End file.
